I received a chain mail from a friend regarding coke tops and rat urine. I felt that I should do something about it, because it's simply just not right for these things to make their rounds as they do. (The email in question is summarized here on Snopes.com)
Here was my response:
I am begging you (all of you), please stop and think before you send these damn things out. Chain e-mails are not logical sources of accurate information, it's not an underground network for sending out warnings that the media or government doesn't want people to know. Chain e-mails are idiotic, and typically only serve to waste network bandwidth while generally just scaring the stupid people of the world.
http://www.snopes.com/medical/toxins/raturine.asp
Snopes.com is a great way to check these things out before sending them. First, you're more likely to be hit by a bus than you are to contract leptospirosis, as mentioned in the above article, and easily verified, there are an average of about 100 to 200 cases of leptospirosis each year in the US, and about half of those occur in Hawaii. Further, the odds of contracting leptospirosis from a coke can (or any other food container stored in the US) are very slim. First of all, the can would have to be in a rat invested environment, and then those rats would have to be carriers. Finally, leptospirosis is only fatal in extreme cases, and is otherwise treatable.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying there's no potential for danger, but you'd be better off sending out emails warning people that they should be careful while driving their cars. If it really makes you feel better, wipe off your cans of soda before drinking them. However, I'd like to offer some insight, cans come off the bottling line, are ringed together (those rings that kill birds), and then are placed in cardboard box bottoms and immediately wrapped in tight plastic before being sent out to stores. Otherwise, they come off the line and are immediate packaged into the tight cardboard boxes in 12, 24 and 36 (Pepsi) packs, and then are stacked on pallets before being sent out to stores. Rarely are cans stored in a way that their tops are exposed.
This is just my 2 cents. My apologies to anyone I cc'd on this who might be bothered by getting more junk in their email box. And yes, I understand the irony of sending out a 'chain email' denouncing chain emails.
Stephen
I'm sure why I feel that I need to act as some kind of crusader of stupid emails, but I feel like I can't just sit by and do nothing.
As I was preparing to send the thing, my good friend Nathan bleeped me, scaring the bejesus out of me.
At this point, I felt I needed to do something to prove to the world that I have conversations with people... that these things actually happen... that I'm not making them up:
12:27 AM nedwards: WALL-E kicked butt
12:28 AM me: lol
I saw Wanted
nedwards: I'd like to see that too -
me: Might do Wall-E on Sunday or Monday
Wanted was pretty sweet
12:29 AM Hold on, I'm sending an anti chain email email... I'll BCC you on it
nedwards: k
12:31 AM me: actually
let me ask your opinion...
should I send this thing out to all the CC's that are listed, or just the original sender...
I'll forward you what I've written...
12:32 AM you should have it
12:33 AM nedwards: forward it to everyone
I've got Sarah using Snopes now everytime before she emails me something stupid
me: I just don't want to piss people off
you know what I mean?
nedwards: And one time she sent me a link with the Snopes link attached
I laughed
12:34 AM me: http://www.woot.com/
nedwards: it won't piss people off - it will make them more enlightened
me: Think this helicopter is any good??
nedwards: dunno - I've heard about one of these that catches on fire
12:35 AM me: hmm
12:36 AM nedwards: I need Jim to send me a few fandango codes
me: I'm still milking the ones he gave me for my birthday
but I don't know how much longer those will hold out, lol
12:37 AM nedwards: Heh
well, with Dark Knight and X-Files in the next couple of weeks, it would be nice to have them
though seeing Dark Knight in Imax would be preferable
12:38 AM me: yeah
I'm pretty eager to see that one
I have to work really hard at it though, because I hate Christian Bale as Batman, but love his work, so I just have to sort of let go and enjoy it
he's just not a good Bruce Wayne to me.
12:39 AM nedwards: I like Christian Bale
I think compared to other Batmans he is certainly the best
though Keaton was a nice combination of sauve, pissed and slightly crazy
12:40 AM Kilmer and Clooney . . . shudder
me: I haven't liked any live action portrayal to date.
I really like The Animated Series construct... and I have no idea who would be better.
12:41 AM nedwards: I used to come home from High School and watch the animated series
me: Needs to be a tall, square jawed, extremely well built guy
Almost like Jason Statham
But not quite... if that makes sense
12:42 AM By the way, trailer for new Jason Statham movie... he's a hard ass, fast driving, super fighting bad guy you have to root for.
nedwards: Heh
me: It's a role you've never seen him in.
Amazing
nedwards: Does he make out with a chick in an unlikely location?
12:43 AM me: I'm not certain, but I'm willing to guess: yes!
nedwards: holy crap - that's a must see
Oh lord, there was a preview before Wall-E
for Beverly Hills Chihuahua
me: Do I really want to know?
12:44 AM nedwards: It had hundreds of singing Chihuahua's dancing around an Aztec ruin
Wow, Aztec ruins in a movie about a Beverly Hills Chihuahua?12:45 AM nedwards: that's a disturbing picture
me: lol, yeah.
here's a disturbing story
12:46 AM me: Wow
That kinda brings a tear to my eye...
nedwards: I'm just cracking up right now because it's on like every major news page
The masturbating walrus dies
12:47 AM me: NEWS FLASH: That's not news!
Here's a question?
Why do I read both Gizmodo and Engadget?
nedwards: Hah, I was just wondering why I read engadget and gadget lab on wired
me: They're the same damned thing!
Seriously... they both posted retirement cards for Bill Gates within minutes of each other.
nedwards: It's not news but it's funny to say masturbating walrus
me: That's just stupid!
Masturbating Walrus
tah
12:49 AM nedwards: heh
rotfl
but not really
me: right
The brain matter gore level in Wanted is pretty intense
I'll be posting my review sometime in the near
12:50 AM actually, I was planning to do it tonight, and then I got that stupid chain email and felt that I needed to sort that out first
nedwards: heh
I'm trying to find a video of the walrus doing his deed
me: You can't be serious...
12:51 AM nedwards: No dude
me: why do you want to actually see that
nedwards: because it's a MASTURBATING WALRUS!
it's right up there with the bonobo monkeys
I recorded a PBS special on them because I heard they have sex instead of handhsakes
12:52 AM We started watching and when they started talking about that part, I told Sarah - "Ahhhh yea, that's what I'm talking about"
Animal sex cracks me up - it's just an odd quirk
12:53 AM me: Yeah... quirk
.... fetish?
nedwards: No, not a fetish
me: lol
nedwards: it doesn't get me off, I just find it funny
me: I know... it's a joke
seriously, though... apart from snails, I couldn't care much less about sex in the wild
12:54 AM I chuckle and all... but really.
nedwards: Dude, monkeys pounding each other like hyperactive jackhammers is just about the funniest thing the the world to me - - -
me: I have to warn you... I'm considering posting this chat on my blog. (with spelling errors corrected.)
nedwards: Don't ask me to explain
Hah!
12:55 AM I feel like I have to prove to the world that these are actual conversations I have with people!
nedwards: this is what happens when you work the graveyard shift for three years
12:56 AM me: I'm thinking I will call it "I was going to post a review of Wanted...:
"
nedwards: lol
12:57 AM me: This is what happens when you spend years as an insomniac with access to the internet
nedwards: there are only three stupid youtube videos - none of which show Ayveq doing his famous . . . thing
12:59 AM me: I'm not sure whether I should be happy about that or not...
If you've actually made it down the page, you might be looking for some sort of conclusion. I don't really have one. I'm absolutely blown away by the fact that we live in a world where a Masturbating Walrus's death can be considered news of any kind. I'm also somewhat astounded by the fact that I actually associate with people in general... between chain emails about fear of death my rat urine, to a friend that considers animal sex to be rife with comedic value, and even to another that is capable of writing a vivid first person narrative of cannibalism... why have I not shut myself up in a little room and given up on the universe.
I suppose it's because then I'd be pretty lonely... and I wouldn't have anything to blog about tonight.
For anyone that might actually want a review of Wanted, check back soon... I promise that I will get one up ASAP. If you can't wait that long, my (mis-counted) one word review of the film is simply: It was pretty good...
Until next time.
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